← Back to all stories

Abby

Bridges High School, Carbondale, Colorado

Growing up in Mexico, I believed that my family would always be together and that I would never be separated from my dad again.

From what I can remember, I used to be filled with excitement every time I would see my father after a long day of work. I remember spending weekends with him in Mexico. We would wake up around 7 in the morning and milk the cows, then go back home to pick up my mom and siblings.  We would all go to the ranch to make breakfast and to check on the horses. Our uncles, aunts, and cousins would also join us every weekend and we would stay out until midnight. These were the best days of my life because we were all happy.

Suddenly my parents started arguing all the time and then my father started to disappear. Some days he would stay out all night, and come home in the early morning hours. He would say that he had a lot of work to do, and I really wanted to believe him because he had never lied to me before. All of a sudden he stopped coming home, which was very hard for me because I was very close to him.

One weekend we went to a charreada, which is like a Mexican rodeo. He didn't let go of his phone and didn’t pay attention to us until we got home at night. His phone kept ringing, so my mom answered it for him. There was another woman on the other end and my mom simply hung up in shock. She didn’t say a thing.

A few weekends later, my dad and I decided to stay home and watch a movie. His phone rang. This time it wasn't that lady again, instead it was his father, my grandfather, telling him that he didn't want him in the house anymore because of what he was doing to us. My dad hung up, grabbed all his things, and left.

I didn't hear from him for a while, which has seriously impacted my life. I would like to feel ready to let go of the disappointment he has created and find a way to forgive him so that I feel good again.

I have struggled in my own relationships because I cannot trust anyone very well. I always think they are going to hurt me just like my father hurt me. If someone so close to me could do it, why wouldn’t they?

I am learning that not everyone is like that. I have to learn to trust myself and build my life so that I will not depend on anyone else to bring me happiness because happiness can only come from ourselves.

This made me think about attaching myself to one person because they can let me down. Sometimes it doesn't matter if it's your dad, he can hurt you if he wants to. There is no person who is going to love you or who's going to love you all your life, so why put that pressure on them.

I moved to Bridges because I wanted to change something inside, but I was scared because I didn’t know anyone. I also had never moved schools.

Turns out, I have never felt more free. This was the best decision for me!

I have teachers helping me talk about these issues in healthy ways and find tools to help me overcome my struggles. I have learned not to pay attention to the things that will hurt me and to pay attention to the things that will help me instead. Teachers are helping me face the hard things I keep wanting to run away from, and I am seeing that that is the only way to really move forward. I will keep working and learning to love and depend on myself more with their help.

© Abby. All rights reserved. If you are interested in quoting this story, contact the national team and we can put you in touch with the author’s teacher.

    Tags:

  • Education
  • Family
  • Friendship and Kindness
  • Loneliness, Doubt or Loss