The saying, “You never know what you have till you lose it,” never really meant anything to me. That is till I moved. I never liked to travel, I hate it. The smell of emptiness, the grieving of losing those close friends, the smell of cardboard boxes and packing tape. It hits differently. What's even worse is I moved all the time since my dad was in the coast guard. It was every two to four years that the time would roll around. I suppose It is good to have the experience of moving around, and getting to know a variety of people. But at the same time it’s a grueling process. The unpacking, rearrangeing, and organization of my new bedroom was another type of stress alone. Everything was scattered everywhere with cardboard boxes stacked in the center of it all. I remember when I used to hate that feeling. A feeling of being unorganized and uncomfortable. But with time it slowly faded, it felt familiar. So bit by bit I built my vision for my room, of course never getting too comfortable with it. By day three to four I see change and my room becomes bearable. Although a good thing about moving is I have time to get settled in before school starts, and thank God for that.

I always struggled to make friends in the beginning, around the sixth grade time period. I mean, could you blame me? I just became a middle schooler. At the time I was still learning who I was, and who I wanted to become. I know one thing I wanted to be in sixth grade though, and that was being popular. In order for that to happen I had to make friends. I had to fit in. Cause if I were to fit I would get along with people, and you're less likely to get into drama. I hate drama. It’s just too much stress, on top of the stress from moving. Sixth grade for me was definitely my wake up call to the world, and what people were and could be. So from there forward I started to build my identity.

I’ve never really enjoyed company when I was younger, I always found ways to keep myself busy. Although I never fully enjoyed being by myself with my thoughts, I always deep down had that social desire. It was like I couldn’t win. I didn’t like being with others. I’ve always had that self conscious feeling that was latched on to my side. Others didn’t help. Not with their opinions, their thoughts, and let alone harmful words. I was small, vulnerable, and definitely not dense. So those opinions were like bullets through my foot. And before I knew it the time I had built up my confidence with the help of my friends it was already time to move. Moving was always a lot to handle for me. It really took a toll on my mental health. As one could imagine. So little old me was forced into finding a solution. Something that could solve both these issues. And that was sports.

Sports are a way I can surround myself with a whole bunch of people and slowly get to know them. A way to relieve my stress. A way to let go of my issues. It was a multi solution. I found myself always running back too. Since I was new I thought, why not. I loved volleyball, I’ve been doing it since I was in seventh grade. Plus I needed friends. Never once has this solution failed though. It wasn’t long before I had a solid two people I knew enough to just straight up talk to. It wasn't long before I was friends with the whole team. Then from there forward they introduced me to their friends till I had a group I was comfortable with. Still to this day I use this. I even have sports year round. The one thing I do love about sports though is that no matter where I move, sports are always gonna be there.

Moving is one of the most stressful things a human can do. To be this experienced with moving is a really helpful skill. So no matter what challenges moving creates, I’ve learned to adapt and make do with what I have. Making it liveable; bearable.

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